{4:33 minutes to read}  In my 20 years as a social capital coach, I’ve noticed that my clients’ success in “unlocking referrals” from their network boils down to how well they engage in the relationship development “progression” of know, like, trust. Relationships get deeper through consistent exposure, whether physically seeing each other at weekly groups or monthly board meetings, or by making it a point to reach out and bring value in ways that keep us top of mind.

In essence, professional relationship building is a courtship process. Said another way, it is an audition process.

During the “referral partner audition process,” we’re demonstrating to the other person our value, our reliability, how we operate — as well as what we’re made of. Ironically, this process is also happening for the other person, like a mirror.

While we’re auditioning them, they’re auditioning us. They want to know if we’re the kind of person they can trust to bring their best clients to. In essence, we are auditioning for their trust.

This leads us to a powerful question: How do I accelerate the audition process, whether I’m auditioning for their trust or they are auditioning for mine?

One of the most profound principles for accelerating the audition process is inspired by the breakthroughs in modern physics.

Every time we enter a room, speak up at a board meeting, or walk through the aisles of our natural food market, people notice the way we’re dressed, what we’re doing, and how we carry ourselves. And in all of these situations, how you portray yourself can either accelerate or halt the audition process. Becoming masterful at the audition process means accelerating the pace at which someone “falls in networking love” with you.

According to quantum physicists, our world is holographic and holistic. In her book “Do You QuantumThink?,” Dianne Collins helps us understand the nature of a hologram. The tiny sticker with the image of the  “peace dove” on the back of Visa cards worldwide is essentially a copy made from an original, i.e., a holographic plate containing the original image of the dove. The plate itself is a thick substance which has an image embedded on it using laser technology. The fascinating thing about laser technology is that it’s only possible because of quantum physics, and therefore holograms are literally products of the new science, a breakthrough of this emerging paradigm.

If the original holographic plate containing the image of the peace dove were to be dropped on a marble floor, it would shatter into hundreds of pieces. Instead of 100 pieces on the floor each containing a partial image (e.g., one piece has the head of the dove while another has the top of the left wing), because of the extraordinary nature of quantum physics, all 100 pieces laying on the floor would contain the entire image of the peace dove. A 2-inch fragment and a 1-inch fragment would both contain the full image of the dove; one image would just be twice the size of the other. This brings us to the definition of “holographic”: the whole is contained in each of its parts.

Here’s how the Hologram Principle applies to networking and the “referral partner audition process”:
The way a man or woman does anything is how that man or woman does everything.

Understanding — and leveraging — the Hologram Principle allows us to be very effective in auditioning people, to see if indeed they are someone we could work with, someone we’d feel confident referring our clients to. The way they do anything is the way they do everything.

Consider that in just 7 encounters with someone, you can already tell how he or she would take care of your client should you refer them.

In the same manner, we are also being auditioned by others. How we interact with someone tells them how we do everything. This should put us on wake-up notice that our actions have an impact. How we clean up a mistake can have an effect on our audition as much as when we nail it perfectly.

Masterfully harnessing the Hologram Principle is a crucial element in accelerating the “referral partner audition process” — in terms of winning the “networking roles” we’re auditioning for, as well as auditioning those who want to win the role with us.

Ask yourself: How do others see you? Which of your success habits help you win the parts you’re auditioning for? Which habits might be standing in the way of you “landing the part” of being someone’s trusted source for serving their precious clients?